Sad

9

I’ve been having a rough couple of days. Just empty places and painful places. Trying to find some joy filled places in between but they’re hiding. I’m not entirely sure where this is coming from. I’m just almost unbearably sad and I can’t find any words. It will get better. Thanks for caring. Beth

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October 8, 2012

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  1. Tracie
    Twitter:
    says:
    October 9, 2012 at 6:05 AM

    It is hard to come back to this place of blogging and start telling the hard stories again. Even when they have a happy ending. Like that saying that goes something like, “writing is easy, just open up a vein and bleed.”

    I’m sorry you are sad. I’m so sorry you are feeling the pain close in, and the joy hard to find. I’m praying for you. The joy is there. It does get better. I promise.
    Tracie recently posted..Hope Fills My LifeMy Profile

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    • Beth says:
      October 9, 2012 at 5:57 PM

      Thanks, Tracie! I think part of the problem is being stuck in the *in between.* We’re past the excruciating crush of the initial pain but no where close to happily ever after. And in the meantime I seem to be extraordinarily sensitive to the pain/sorrows of those around me. I’ve always had a compassionate heart but right now it is as if, when I see pain and sorrow in some one else’s eyes … it sinks deep into my own heart. Not sure if that even makes sense. I want to be compassionate but empathy is hard! Especially when I have so much of my own pain to carry already! And Jesus says to give it all to HIM! I’ve been listening to David Platt’s Radical at night but last night I paused that audiobook and just listened to 1st John (the whole thing) over and over until I fell asleep. Trying to remember whatsoever is true, right, noble, etc. =) LOVE you!
      Beth recently posted..SadMy Profile

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      • Tracie
        Twitter:
        says:
        October 12, 2012 at 9:17 PM

        It makes so much sense. When I am in a dark place, I often take on other people’s pain. When you have already poured out your energy on making it through your own day, sometimes there is nothing left for helping to carry other people’s pain, and it can quickly overwhelm you.

        The in between is hard. I’m going to keep praying!
        Tracie recently posted..The Time I Was Jealous Of My KidMy Profile

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  2. Rorybore
    Twitter:
    says:
    October 9, 2012 at 9:31 AM

    This too shall pass.
    Sounds trite and unfeeling – but I know it to be true. God is faithful and we keep our eyes on Him – this dark shadow is only a passing thing. The Dawn always comes and hope will be renewed.
    I once read somewhere that even on the darkest, cloudiest day – the Sun was still there – it’s just hidden behind the clouds. It never stops “being.” It just waits for its turn to shine again. And often, it shines out all the brighter after a passing storm.
    And now I have that song from Annie stuck in my head “The Sun’ll Come out Tomorrow….” LOL
    But it will my friend, it will. <3
    Rorybore recently posted..Tuesday Coffee Chat: Hero Up!My Profile

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    • Beth says:
      October 9, 2012 at 5:59 PM

      There are worse songs to have stuck in your head! =) Thank you for being a voice of encouragement! I think part of the problem is being stuck in the *in between.* We’re past the excruciating crush of the initial pain but no where close to happily ever after. And in the meantime I seem to be extraordinarily sensitive to the pain/sorrows of those around me. I’ve always had a compassionate heart but right now it is as if, when I see pain and sorrow in some one else’s eyes … it sinks deep into my own heart. Not sure if that even makes sense. I want to be compassionate but empathy is hard! Especially when I have so much of my own pain to carry already! And Jesus says to give it all to HIM! I’ve been listening to David Platt’s Radical at night but last night I paused that audiobook and just listened to 1st John (the whole thing) over and over until I fell asleep. Trying to remember whatsoever is true, right, noble, etc. =) LOVE you!
      Beth recently posted..SadMy Profile

      Reply
  3. Noelle says:
    October 9, 2012 at 1:56 PM

    :( hang in there friend! I’ll add some extra prayers just for you.

    Reply
  4. tiffany
    Twitter:
    says:
    October 9, 2012 at 11:28 PM

    I have been there, when the pain of those around me is crushing. I pray you are able to find relief, to tangibly hand it over to God and truly trust His character that He’s “got this.” I am a burden bearer. Sometimes good, sometimes dangerous to my own self.

    Lots of hugs friend.
    tiffany recently posted..Carpe Diem. And also cherish it.My Profile

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    • Beth says:
      October 11, 2012 at 10:07 PM

      I remember years ago going to a Christian Seminar and hearing the concept of “taking up offenses” for the first time. Basically its where you are offended by sins, or situations, that don’t involve you. I was instantly convicted that this was an area that I was going to struggle to surrender. Burden bearer sounds better … and it is since it implies more compassion than taking up offenses but both involve carrying burdens that the Lord never intended us to bear! Thanks Tiffany!
      Beth recently posted..Getting ThereMy Profile

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