I told Josiah, who is working 40+ hours a week and going to school full time, that I was feeling a little overwhelmed by the combination of life, work and school, and he suggested that I look for sympathy elsewhere! Hard to believe we used to think this boy had the primary spiritual gift of mercy! He has turned into an impenitent prophet here lately! =) Actually he still has a soft heart. He just hides it better!

Life

Bert is having intermittent spells where his language gets all confused and it scares me. A lot! He also has some weakness, especially on his right side. I have attempted to encourage him to take it easy, to not strain himself, to rest more, even to consider retirement. The truth of the matter is that he doesn’t want to slow down and he doesn’t want me harping at him! I did tell him one day that if something happened to him because he was exerting his independent streak that his sisters would never forgive me. He promised to live long enough to call and tell them it wasn’t my fault! We try to laugh. I try not to nag. I can’t seem to help some degree of worry (God forgives me) but I try not to be a mother hen. Y’all can pray for me! And for him. I want to keep him around as long as possible! He is VERY disciplined with his daily walks (3+ miles at 0 Dark thirty) and almost as disciplined with food.

I have not been back to the YMCA regularly in quite a while. Between injuries and other complications … it just hasn’t happened. I need to go though because for some reason it is hard for me to be disciplined on my eating if I’m not exercising. It would be lovely if I could just make myself go out and walk but my knees, hips and back just will not tolerate it! Hopefully I can lose enough weight over the next few months to make walking, for pleasure if not for exercise, a possibility next Spring.

Money is beyond tight right now and we are going to have to pull the purse strings super tight to make it through the winter. I confess that there are areas where I could make much better choices! (Acrylic nails, sweaters, purses and my Crocs addiction come to mind.) I have to believe that things will work out eventually. In the meantime I managed to give myself permission to pay to have my yard cleaned up for the winter and my kitchen cleaned and organized today. Maybe not priority items but they made me feel better about this place that we call home and none of us have the time, or energy, to tackle it! And it wasn’t that expensive!

I had hoped that Erica was going to be able and willing to help with some housework but she struggles with bad anxiety and depression as well as some pretty severe chronic pain and hasn’t been able to make it over yet. Please keep her in your prayers. She knows how much she has lost and it’s scary and depressing to have to fight your way back to trust. Enough said for now.

I was hoping that we would be able to go to Texas for Thanksgiving but it isn’t looking likely. I’m not sure when I last saw my family. Too long and I really want to go but I’m training to service a new client and, assuming I make it that far … I will have certification calls on the evening of the 21st. Yuck! Josiah won’t be home for Thanksgiving as he is planning to go to Tennessee for a friend’s wedding. Guess it will be just me, Bert and a turkey in our empty nest!

Work

I lost a lot of hours this past month due to Bert’s health, my health, the electric company killing my phone line, etc. and had one really bad (quality control) call when I had a splitting headache and should have taken the day off! As a result my quality stats were not optimal and I got 2 emails in a row today suggesting that I should shape up or ship out. (My words. Not theirs.) It was very frustrating on top of everything else but it’s okay. I know what the issues are and I can, and will, work to correct them! It’s just hard because although it’s better than the job I quit … I don’t really enjoy what I’m doing right now. Too stressful and if there is anything I don’t need it’s more stress! It has been almost laughable this week as the company I contract with is based in New Jersey and the systems are a MESS! Thankfully most customers are understanding though I had one poor lady in tears today yelling at me that she didn’t care what my excuses were … she wanted an answer. And in a way that was one of the highlights of my day as, although I couldn’t give her an answer … I could give her some hope and make her laugh before we hung up!

School

I decided to train to take on another client, hoping that I will like it better, so I am in “school” (virtual classroom) from 6:00 – 10:00 Monday through Friday nights until Thanksgiving training to service AAA Emergency Roadside Service calls for Northern California, Nevada and Utah. I also have an hour or two of homework to do daily.  So far I REALLY like the system. I just hope I like talking to stressed out people!

And I would add some “this and that” but I’m almost at 1000 words and my life just isn’t that interesting! Especially at almost 1:00 in the morning! Love you guys!